The Big Fat Golden One

Preface: It's my birthday today, June 20th.

Post-preface: June 20th has also been named by congress "Bald Eagle Restoration Day" or some such, because the Bald eagle is about to become un-endangered. Now, an eagle may not be a falcon, but I would point out that BOTH are birds of prey. Therefore, I am going to go ahead and thank congress for honoring my birthday with a celebration that has a vague connection to my last name. Really the United States Government, you shouldn't have.

Main post: I guess this is my "Golden birthday." You know, where the day of the month matches the age of the birthee. In my case that number is 20 - a solemn occasion indeed. In this past I have been accused of not taking these things seriously enough, but this year I have already layed out my holocaust cloak and plan to remain beneath it's dark, voluminous layers for the remainder of the day. Thus, when people ask me why I am walking down the street in a giant black cloak in the middle of summer, I will peer out from beneath my hood - my face half covered in shadows - and answer in a deathly whisper: "It is my GOLDEN birthday and I am treating it with all due solemnity."

I have the urge to climb a mountain, ride a wave, tame a sea urchin and use it to brush my hair in the mornings - but such is my nature. Often enough I just like to have ME time on such days of birth, which is just a nice way of saying that I do crazy and mildly dangerous things on my own. This time, I am settling on having a massive evening dinner. We are eating sushi, and the 1% chance that someone could die from raw fish poisoning at any point during the meal will have to satisfy my lust for danger. And yes, that is the official name: "Raw Fish Poisoning." It's all quite scientific.

What I love most about birthdays is how every single daily act seems to fall meekly in line behind this title. For instance, my friend just bought me some birthday tea. Tonight I will go and have a birthday dinner. I like to take it to the next level, however, and talk about how this morning I birthday woke up, did some birthday choirs, and then took a birthday nap. Perhaps later I will birthday change-my-clothes.

Really, people, I just popped out of the womb! We all did it (great idea for a bumper sticker: "Pro-life peer pressure: Pop out of the womb - every one's doing it.") Still, I am grateful for the confirmations of love and fellowship, and for the natural period of self-reflection. We humans loves our rites of passage, and it's clear why. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a holocaust cloak to put on.